John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

ok so there was a black guy a white guy and an asian in a bar.so the asian guy says lets leave and they all exited the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Farts smell bad!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Dave: Say "game" ten times fast Bud: Game, game, game, game, gay ma, gay ma, I'm gay, I'm gay, I'm gay

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do a a pickle and a rabbit have in common? They are both green...except the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why didn't the blonde laugh at my blonde joke? She's dead. She should of laughed at my jokes more.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops