- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

Your mamas so fat. She fat.

Ask me if i'm a tree... "Are you a tree?".... No

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

What's the difference between a plum and a bunny? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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