What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

hey i just meet you and this is crazy but i picked out our wedding cake and named our 4 future children :-)))))))

what did the nazi say to the jew? hi

How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

'THIS IS NOT A JOKE, YOU ARE THE 1000000TH VIEWER'...

Knock knock. Come in.

An Arab walks into a bar. He then blows up the bar.

A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

Ben Colbert is gay

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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