What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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How did the people get into the pyramid?? They didn't

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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how do you make coffee you put it in a mug

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I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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A Mormon walks into a bar.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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Nickelback.

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My friend may look like a circle but..... ......He's actually a square.......

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Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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69

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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How did the lifegaurd break his leg? He was hit by a submarine!

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9/11/01 walks into a bar

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whats brown and black and sits in a tree...... a bird

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The Economy

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A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops