your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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What did the moose say to the hunter? I don't know, what? Nothing, a moose is an animal therefore it can't say anything.

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

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how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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I've got the moobs like jagger.

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why did the chicken cross the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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