What do you call a black guy that sings? A singer.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

Hey Caleb.

Oliver's friends

What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

knock, knock Sho'sthere? Sam who? Sam Butt

Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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