How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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Golf.

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Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

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why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks: "why that long face?" The horse, being a horse, thus not being able to comprehend the complexities of a conversation, says nothing and then shits on the floor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you

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What did the farmer say when he lost his donkey? "Oh no, my donkey is my livelihood and the only means I have of supporting my family. Now, we shall surely starve."

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

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How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

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Women's rights

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A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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roses are white violets are green if you you sit on santas lap he will stab you

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johann grayson being liked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops