Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

Why did the bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

LeBron in the fourth quarter

What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

roses are red violets are red i smell my wife nows shes dead

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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