Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Hej Erik och Leo!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...