Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Andoni was here

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Your big dick.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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