What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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