I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

how many girlfriends does robert dupra have? none becomes his sister doesn't count trololololol

why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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