whos on the right track? lady gaga

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET TOWARDS GOING BEYOND YOUR FIFTH SENSE... UNLOCKING YOUR SIXTH SENSE! (redux:Chronoshift extend Xr`d Utrawave edition) 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :( 7. Pressure :/ 8. Itch :O 9.Thermoception: Ability to sense heat and cold :S 10.Proprioception: This sense gives you the ability to tell where your body parts are. 11.Coordination. :/ 12. Nociception: In a word, pain. This was once thought to simply be the result of overloading other senses, such as “touch”, but this has been found not to be the case and instead, it is its own unique sensory system. There are three distinct types of pain receptors: cutaneous (skin), somatic (bones and joints), and visceral (body organs). Moral Man the Friendly arsonist, motherpounder: I SHALL GLADLY HELP YOU UNLEASH YOUR 12th SENSE TO ITS FULLEST DEGREE!

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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