Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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How did the old man die? His family locked him in the basement and then burned the house

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Two black guys run into a bank with guns. They place them in their pre-payed safety deposit boxes and continue on their way as they were falling behind on their schedule.

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What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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some people say that i am gay they are right cause i like boys

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What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

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What would you call it if Justin Bieber had sex with a woman? Sex, because thats what it is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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