What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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epic win?

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops