A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Donald Trump

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

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What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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