"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

Knock Knock. Come in.

Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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