Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

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Why doesn't Batman exist? Because he was made up.

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So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops