What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Yellow People !!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

I don't have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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