How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Why was the boy sad The boy wanted a puppy for his Birthday So his parents got him a Toy dog Later that year he was found dead with the Toy Dog shoved down his mouth gagging him.

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Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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