What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

I saw a number three walking past me in the street the other day and I thought to my self that's odd.

add me on facebook guys , im sexy , i get mad girls and guys, im bisexual , and im a blood (the gang) http://www.facebook.com/brock.beatty.1?ref=ts

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

What do you do if a black man steals your flatscreen TV? Give up, he's probably in Mexico by now.

What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

What did the dog say to the tree? Bark.

What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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