Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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Chris is hairy

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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