How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

Yo Momma's sooo fat that the speed of light at her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s.

What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

Jess Burns

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

women's lacrosse.

Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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