welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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A bird flew into a cave and Batman said, "GET OOOUUUTTT!"

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What is the definition of “making love”? Something a woman does while a guy is f-ing her.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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What looks red and smells like barf? Depends on how you look at the situation.

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What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

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Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

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Why don't traffic lights go swimming? Because they aren't sentient or animate, and therefore can't decide to undertake such an activity. Even if they were sentient, they wouldn't enjoy swimming as the water would damage their electrical works.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops