Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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And now a word from our sponsors

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how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What makes my fourth grade librarian hot? The fact that I set her on fire

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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Yo mama is so fat, she just had a heart-attack.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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