1 woman and 2 guys were on a roadtrip. Every single day they would go do the same things. First go to Denny's, then to the mall, then see a horror movie. One day the woman said, "I don't want to go see the horror movie, I'm scared enough!" So the guys agreed that they'd trick the woman into going to a horror movie before Denny's. They went, and the woman was scared out of her mind. She yelled at them both for 30 minutes and to this day never speaks to them.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

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Roses are green violets are brown wait a minute..........my shoes untied

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What did spongebob say to patrick? Im ready! im ready!

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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how to turn invisable. eat yourself

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Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

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Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

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your mom is so stupid she has a low iq

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

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Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Jhon is riding his wheelchair, but can't get up the driveway. Lucky a stranger passes by. Jhon: Can you help me please sir? Stranger: No

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Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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A girl talks to here boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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yeyeyeyeye live action

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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