Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

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What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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If Sally has 4 apples and Dan has 3 apples, how many apples do they have together? Red, because ducks have 2 legs.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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Q:What type of cheese isn't yours? A:NACHO CHEESE!!!!!!!!!

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why did my girlfriend fail her test? she was pregnant :'(

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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wanna hear a joke? no

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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