Knock Knock Who did that?

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

knock knock go away

kkkk

Shltskc gw? G

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

How many bears does it take to screw in a light bulb? None; it’s a fairly menial task requiring little more than a single human hand. Requisitioning any number of bears for the effort would be an extremely dangerous “Rube Goldberg”-esque solution to simple problem.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

Why does the Batman theme song have 'na na na na na na na na' in it so many times? I guess Batman really likes sodium. Or maybe his record player's broken.

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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