A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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I'm Spartacus

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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A blonde is running for her life and sees a sign that says "GO LEFT TO SURVIVE". She goes right and she survives.

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

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how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

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Why was the man killed before he could finish his anti joke? Because he

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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