"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Obama = ebola

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

How do you get a baby to start crying? Drop a brick on it. How do you get it to stop crying? Drop two bricks on it.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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