Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the cop shoot his 4 year old son? Because the little bitch ate his leftovers

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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How do you make a person cry? Burn his family.

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I'm 23, just like most people my age.

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what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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WILLY

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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Q: How many Marys does it take to drive you crazy? A: Just one ::stares at Mary Annoyingly::

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What do you call a dog with 2 legs? Doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyways.

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How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

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Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

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What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

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i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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