What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

Caroline Kelly.

Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

4 men walk into a bar. They have fun. ~Yasmin~

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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