Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

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A man died.

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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I once was an adventurer like you. But then I quit.

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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Why did the girl lie to the priest? because she didn't want to tell him the truth

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You know those people that learned the true name of God, as God asked kindly... ...Well you know God can be nice sometimes but he actually COMMANDED they keep his name secret forever? They became the first people known as Jehova`s witnesses... JEHOVAH<<< SECRET NAME ANYBODY? So much for keeping his secret name guys! They claim that only a few thousand humans will ascend to heaven, in other words all of the JEHOVA`s witnesses... All two billions of them or something... For keeping his name (Cough JEHOVAH) secret. SUCCESS!

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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