What falls down, but never gets back up? A dead person.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Mark Mark who? Mark Jennings. Oh hey, Mark, come in.

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Yo mama's so fat that she has a heart condition.

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Q: What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? A: A Problem. Q: What do you call 100 Chelsea fans on the moon? A: An even bigger problem. Q: What do you call all the Chelsea fans on the moon? A: Problem solved hahaha Q: What would you get if Newcastle were relegated? A: 45,000 more Chelsea fans

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What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

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Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

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Whats more fun than swinging a baby around on a clothesline at 200 miles per hour ? Stopping it with a shovel

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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What was Tiger (from Whinnie the Pooh) looking for in the toilet? Pooh

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a guy was waiting for his date, then she arrived and they went happily to the cinema

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I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

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Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

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What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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Sloths

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

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What happened to the old lady with a hat? She fell down

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binladin walks into the american seals

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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