A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I would like a rum and............ Coke." The bartender asks, curiously, "What's up with the big pause?" The bear looks down at his paws, embarrassed, and mumbles under his breath, "social anxiety."

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How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

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Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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What did the crowd do when a lion walked into the bar? Got up and left because they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

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Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

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What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, I am Colorblind...FML

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Wenis Penis

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Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

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I just threw up..In my pants.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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(PC) What did the homosexual man say when accidently sat on a stick? Ouch.

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what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

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Knock knock Who's there Banana Bananas can't talk. Crap he's on to me

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What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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