You know what's catchy? A cold

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

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How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

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What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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knock knock whos there make up make up who hahahaha you said make a poo

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Smeg...

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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At his sentencing, a judge tells a convicted murderer that he will be hanged at noon on one weekday in the following week but that the execution will be a surprise to the prisoner. He will not know the day of the hanging until the executioner knocks on his cell door at noon that day. Having reflected on his sentence, the prisoner draws the conclusion that he will survive the hanging. His reasoning is in several parts. He begins by concluding that the "surprise hanging" can't be on Friday, because if he hasn't been hanged by Thursday, there is only one day left - and so it won't be a surprise if he's hanged on Friday. Since the judge's sentence stipulated that the hanging would be a surprise to him, he concludes it cannot occur on Friday. He then reasons that the surprise hanging cannot be on Thursday either, because Friday has already been eliminated and if he hasn't been hanged by Wednesday night, the hanging must occur on Thursday, making a Thursday hanging not a surprise either. By similar reasoning he concludes that the hanging can also not occur on Wednesday, Tuesday or Monday. Joyfully he goes to his cell confident that he has been spared from the hanging. The next week, the executioner knocks on the prisoner's door at noon on Wednesday and prisoner is completely surprised!

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Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? A tree stapled to a baby

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Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

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What's the difference between Stephani and a momma hippo? The mother hippo is slowly but surely losing weight while Stephani is packing on the pounds! :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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