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Do you know why the Mexican didn't like hot dogs? I don't know either.

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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YouTube Is Red Facebook Is Blue Porn Hub Is Down You'll Have To Do

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A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

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Guest what? Dog

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

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What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

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How many people does it take to drive a car? 1 person

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Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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