a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

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What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

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What did the blonde say when she saw anti-joke.com for the first time? Nothing. She's been in a vegetative state for three years and her parents finally decided to pull the plug.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

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A psychotic man steals a Police Officer's handgun, the man runs down the street. What happened? He fell in a hole and died.

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

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What happens when three drunk men are driving 80 miles off of a cliff. They all die on impact from the great fall and their family's mourn over their deaths for years to come.

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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roses are red violets are blue the thing in the toilet reminds me of you :)

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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Why did the little boy fall out the window? A child molester pushed him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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