A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

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Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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I like touching my boobs

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calender? They each got six months.

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The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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