Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely and should probably go to the hospital.

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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A deranged serial killer walks into a bar. No one leaves because he looks like a normal guy.

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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Why isn't Michael Jackson aloud at Disney world? He is dead.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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What did batman say to robin before they entered the batmobile? Get in.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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