Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

SHUT UP JP

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why did joe drop his clock? billy ran into him, therfore making the clock wobble in his hand until it fell at 34 mph.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Gingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

thumb_up thumb_down +14

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Caca.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops