Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

a black guy hates chicken.

What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

What do you call a blond reading a book? A blond reading a book.

What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

Who is worse than Adolf Hitler? Lebron James

Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

roses are red, violets are blue, niggers are black and so is my poo

Why didn't the boy eat chocolate yesterday Because he was allergic.

How many Jews can you fit in a Car? 2 in the front seat 3 in the back seat 5 in the trunk and a couple thousand in the Ashtray -WSS Gaming

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

Three men walk into a bar. Something happens not at relating to them.

There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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