Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

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STOP BULLYING FAT PEOPLE. They have enough on their plate

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What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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Two Lawyers were talking to one another. The first lawyer said, "Wow this is the fourth case I've won in a row!" The other lawyer did not know how to respond because of the men the other lawyer put in jail had escaped from jail and already killed the lawyer's family.

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What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? none, you can't see them in the dark. Vincent

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If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it? no, but it was home to several endangered species that are now extinct

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Why had the father left his family. Because he was tired of dancing in a circle.

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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