What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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Why did the car fall of the cliff? The dude driving the car was driving recklessly.

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What did the man say to his wife. Hi

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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I love pissing people off :P

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What happens when a women becomes pregnant? She gives birth to a child 9 months later.

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How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

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Yo Mama is so dumb, that she scored significantly below average on the SAT's.

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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How do you find out if your son is ok? Ask him.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Penis

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Why didn't Hitler like steak? He was a vegetarian.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops