Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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michael: How old do I look? stranger: about 68? How old are you? michael: I cant remember I have alzheimers. michael: How old do I look?

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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Why didnt the 14 year old get her period? Because she had gotten pregnant by her father

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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Where did tommy go during the bomb? Everywhere. he was a cripple and couldnt make it to the bomb shelter.

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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How do you make your grandma fly? Push her off the back of a plane.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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Riddle me this, riddle me that. I'll eat your f^cking cat.

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if you had a pulmonary embolism, you would be too

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Banana. Banana who? The Holocaust.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you look closely, it's not a chicken, it's a man wearing a costume. He's going to a halloween party with some friends. Sally was not invited.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops