Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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What's the difference a ham and bugs bunny? -When I see a ham on the dinner table, I eat it. When I see bugs bunny on the dinner table and asks me "what's up, doc?" I stay away from sugar for a while and get tested for heroin

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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What do a woman and a puzzle have in common? Both couldn't vote before 1920... the puzzles still can't vote

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

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What did john say to dave when his grandfather died ?

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25

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What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

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What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

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A miserable man committed suicide.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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what do you call an old man missing a toe? a diabetic.

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How do you break up with a guy? you kick him in the nuts.

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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Wanna hear a joke? Your contact list.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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