What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

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Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

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Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

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What's worse than the Holocost? Two worms in your apple.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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What has eyes but cannot see? A blind man.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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What did the boy with a crippled arm get for his birthday? A guitar.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

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Q:What the worst lie you have ever told??!!???!?!?!?!? A: I have read and agree to the Terms and Service

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little potato when born allicator don't have neck, if u like me it's cause u stole my scooter

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You bumder!

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Knock Knock! EXPLOSION!!!!

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

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What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens aren't very intelligent and therefore it didn't see the possible dangers that could occur.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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