I had a submarine.... once

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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What happens when a super saiyan eats a fully grown pineapple? hehe xd

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I used to be an adventurer like you, until old age slowly took away my ability to move and go adventuring

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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A elementary school child was waiting at the bus stop for the bus to come. All of the sudden, the bus comes around the corner, pulls up, stops and he gets in.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

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Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

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why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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How do you make Mandy Ann shut up? Clown Car

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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