What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-oh But the farmer killed and ate him, because Bingo licked himself inappropriately

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno ask the chicken

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

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knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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How many amoebas does it take to change a light bulb? Depending on your religious belief and the variation in evolutionary growth, a full study on the answer would require immense time and be very costly. I would also not feel comfortable providing an answer based on opinion or estimated guess. The answer is therefor be inconclusive.

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to get to the other side.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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