roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

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Why did 'Mister Love' get arrested? Clue: One of the most ironic things ever You can guess

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

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My asian freind died recently... But on another note why did the chicken cross the road.Crosing the road is a metaphor for killing yourself and the chicken is my asian freind.

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What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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So when I came home from work the other day, I saw tha my dog was foaming at the moth, so I took him to the vet It turns out that my dog didn't have a thing for marshmallows but had rabies instead and was promptly put down.

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KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

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how many jews does it take for me to be able to have sex with my cousin's girlfriend? idk, but that's how many I need. actually let me have some extras. couldn't hurt.

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What do you call a black guy who walks into your house and takes your stuff. A repoman, pay your taxes next time

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Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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What did the boy say to his friend? nothing, they were both deaf

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A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops