Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

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Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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What would be the worst thing to do to Helen Keller? Cut her hands off, as it would destroy her last chance at communication and re-arranging her house so she often fell nub first over chairs.

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

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Why does Jordan Abu aita have a small pepe? Because he is black

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James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

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An asian man walks into a taxi. The driver asked which chinese or electronic store woupd u like to go to?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because his work office was there and if he had not crossed, he would have had to get back in his car and parked in the company parking space therefore taking more time and costing a small but significant amount of money

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

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Roses are red, Violets are Violate and not fucking blue.

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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Why didn't LeBron James go to college? Because the opportunity to secure millions of dollars in salary straight out of high school was too lucrative for him to pass up.

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What's one thing that bothers EVERYONE? Mother Theresa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops