I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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If life gives you lemons, keep them because hey, free lemons

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

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Lets just say that we are beyond the stage where I am "just" trying, by the way, you might want to search that last comment for double negatives. Or you know NOT NOT. Do not take my word for it, but if I am not wrong, the bacteria (yogurt) leaves afterwards, so you are eating milk that has been eaten and then.. You know... A common "side effect" of hypnosis, is that when it is used, the one hypnotized (both in this case) end up feeling a "strange" case of closeness, stronger bonds, friendship etc, scientists wonder why... ITS LIKE DUH! WE BOTH REVEAL DEEP SECRETS TO EACH OTHER! THINGS WE DO NOT EVEN USUALLY TELL OURSELVES! Its a literal no brainer, scientits can go fuck themselves, because as far as I know, thats the only fuck they ever get.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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what do you call the head-less man sitting on your porch? By what ever his name is!!

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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Yo mommas so fat We are terribly concerned about her health

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a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

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Why is Finnish taxi driver smiling while driving? He's happy.

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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how many niggaz dose it take to fit in al lightbolb?? 36 ahahahh yall deez nutz

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Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

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Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

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Q. what has one million arms and tells it to people A.a liar

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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