what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

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(A man in a dark van pulls up)... Hey kids can you come help me find my puppy? The kids get in the car and they find the puppy in a near by park. The kids are then safely returned home.

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Q: What is worse than a dead baby in a trashcan? A: A dead baby in 10 trashcans.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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Why did Emily sit in a lonely corner? Because she just wanted to okay!

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How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

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whats worse then finding a worn in your apple the holocaust whats worse then the holocaust two worms in your apple

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why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

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Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sociopathic murderer.

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Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

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What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

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What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

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What did santa claus get the boy with cancer for christmas? Nothing. Santa is not real and thus incapable of granting christmas wishes.

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I america you read books. But in Soviet Russa, Books read YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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A man with Down's Syndrome walks into bar. Bartender asks, "why the long face?"

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Yo mama's so fat that she has a heart condition.

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A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

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A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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whats the best thing ever to happen to chuk norris ? he was born !!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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