Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

I work at jcpenny

A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

What's brown, no one likes and has had a bad history? Dog poop

Knock knock whos there telephone telephone who telephone refiridgerator

Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

24

People just dont care about me, yesterday I got a coconut in my head and... AWWWW thats horrible! Yeah I... So did the coconut make it?

knock knock whos there? orange orange who? orange you pissed off your wifes taking in the ass from another guy right now?

Whats the difference between a pizza and a baby? Humans don't eat babies, other than a Cannibals because some tend to eat babies.

Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

When do you know when to stop making anti- jokes? when your done with your joke and click submit.

Hellen Keller walks into a bar. Well, at least she thinks she did.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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