Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin said "Wow, its hot in here." The other muffin said "Oh my gosh a talking muffin!" The house burnt down because the oven created a fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

thumb_up thumb_down +16

knock knock who's there BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! BANG!! who OPEN THE DOOR ITS THE POLICE

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

So, two people park their car and walk into a bar. Wait, no. They were walking into a grocery store and they were riding skateboards, not a car. Then, the kid walks in after them. Oh, did I forget to mention they had children? And also, they're married. So anyway, they walk into this grocery store, and meet a barkeep. Wait no that's ridiculous why would a barkeep be in a grocery store. Let me start over. Bah.. never mind. I forgot what happened next, but it was REALLY FUNNY!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

there are two muffins in an oven. one says "its getting hot in here". the other says " oh my gosh!!! its a talking muffin!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

thumb_up thumb_down +16

shammmm is a lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the Police Officer pull over the black man? The black man was not following the rules of the road and accepted the ticket with great remorse. The Officer then proceed to pull over a white man for this very same offence.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you get if you cross a horse with a cow? A horse and a cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many times can the Frenchman cheat on his wife? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops