What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

What's worse than getting a flat tire on a date? getting one while rushing your dying grandfather to the hospital.

How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

My dad

Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

roses are head mydick is blue i live in somolia and i killed all the jews

How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

You know what's funnier than 24? 25

doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

I like U.............................nicorns :D

A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

How do you start a riot in Mexico? Roll a penny down the street.

My name is Harry.

What's up with women with there jewlery it's there's best friend,but a black man's best friend is reames..

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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