What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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What did the duck say to the moose? Quack

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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With the exception of pigs, both pigs and blue jays can fly

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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what did the little boy get from santa claus on christmas? nothing santa isnt real

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

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how does a a fat person dance? with his feet

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

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Why do girls like Justin Beiber? They dont

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What's the deal with brown?

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whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

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What did Obama say to Hilary? Will you be my secretary of state?

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Roses are red Violents are blue Oranges

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Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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my mom died because she was morbidly obese

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What do you get when you cross a turkey with a turtle? A bunch of nosy ass people wondering wtf you're doing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops