Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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Nock Nock It's open.

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Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

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What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

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A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

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Knock knock. Racism.

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You mom is so fat she appeals to my secret fetish.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Tunechi

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What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops