Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

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their were 2 muffins. one said hello how are you. the other screamed "A TALKING MUFFIN"

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

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What do you call ugly? Dionne Dodds

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

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Why did Martin go to school with no pants on? Because he had no legs.

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Yesterday, I was hosting a party, and there were a lot of people crowding around some fruit punch I made all trying to get a glass... Whoops, it appears I forgot the Punch line.

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. (do you get it cause the robot has no arms)

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

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A dyslexic woman goes into a saloon and asks for a hair cut. Oh right, she doesn't have hair! Then why the f*** would she enter the saloon? Because she wanted to get her nails done. But she doesn't have nails either, and she doesn't want to drink. She came there because she wanted to hook up with a guy!

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what happened to the farm animals? They were slaughtered and their parts were sold as meat, glue and other useful materials

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Q:Which do you take out more...trash or recycle? A: Greenery

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I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops