how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

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What's for dinner? Flesh from when your brother was alive and your blood.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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Who saw 9/11 as a miracle? The undertakers

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She's dead.

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What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

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Trolololollolololololololololololololol

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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How long does it take a Jewish man to pleasure his wife? There are many factors that go in to pleasuring a woman, none of which are readily measureable

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Come on Red, I am linked with the fucking global bank, that does not mean I go there and get the money! The FBI keeps tabs on absolutely everything, everybody knows that, if Mike Tyson has a cup of tea there, they file him down. Its legal, its secure and incredibly expensive, but the FBI stands for the security of the US alone, that does not mean that they do not work with every other corporation, organization, affiliation,syndicate, and pff, anything. If you suspect that I somehow went from being one of the key members of the underground, to a fucking FBI agent, you can believe that, but then dont ask me for help, nor be my friend, without trust there is no friendship.

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What did the bully call the box? a square, needless to say the box was offended

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what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say orange? Well you shouldn't be. I came to tell you your family died in a car crash and you have AIDS.

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Q.What did the anti-joke reader say to the doctor? A-My finger is stuck on the dislike button.

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A man goes to the beach to meat babes, but know one seemes to notice him. The man notices another man with a crowed of beautiful women surrounding him. Later that day he stops the man and asks him, how do you get all those girls? the man replies put a potato in your bathing suit. so the next day the man puts a potato in his bathing suit, this time he notices girls walking by and laughing, he goes to the man at the end of the day and asks why it did not work, the man replies, next time try putting the potato in the front

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What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

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What did the man say when he lost his keys? "Where's my keys?!"

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Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

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A: What time is it? B: Half past six.

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Why Did The Black Guy Eat Watermelon? Because he lives in south africa where they are commonly grown and needed a healthy snack.

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Why was the Asian so good at ping-pong? Disciprine.

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why didn't the blond laugh at the anti-joke? because, she was aborted in her mom's third trimester

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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